** Warning. I’m going to talk about baby poop. You have been warned**
I know you don’t have the capability at this point to control your bodily functions, however, if you are going to poop in the bathtub, Momma would really appreciate it if you could reserve that little jewel for when your Daddy is home to help. Also, when I remove you from the fouled water, please understand it is for your own health and best interests. I am not, as your screams imply, doing it just to spite you and your bath time fun.
In addition, I’d just like to add that cleaning up a “poop in the tub” incident was far easier when you were still small enough to fit in the baby tub, which is small enough to be sprayed out over the toilet. My experience last night with the big tub, a sponge, bleach, and about a hundred tub toys was less than pleasant. This led to me calling your father and demanding a frozen concoction (preferably alcoholic if possible) be purchased and brought to me right quick.
I love you, but I would not be sad to see this episode repeated by my future grandchildren when their daddy is on duty. I’m just saying.